Why we hate to change our minds

I’ve posted on Confirmation Bias on this blog before – a long time ago- it’s worth repeating so i’ve reposted this from MGH’s blog…(If you don’t know how and why your mind works the way it does then you are not in control of your own mind – it is in control of you!)

ADD . . . and-so-much-more

The Greater our Investment
The greater the likelihood
we will hold on to ideas that don’t serve us

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Foundational Concept of the Intentionality Series
Opinions vs. Facts

Sometimes people hold a core belief that is very strong.  Presented with conflicting information, accepting the new evidence would create a feeling that is extremely uncomfortable (called cognitive dissonance)

And because it is so important to protect that core belief, they will rationalize, ignore, and even deny anything that doesn’t fit with the core belief.~ Franz Fanon, Free Your Mind and Think

Confirmation Bias

There has been a great deal of research and writing on the implications of the concept of confirmation bias. I have often referred to the concept here on ADDandSoMuchMORE.com, so many of my regular readers are already familiar with the expression.

Given today’s political climate, I believe it is…

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Human Purpose

What is my (our) purpose in life?


This is a variation on a common venn diagram explaining Purpose ( Bliss in this case) but i find it has some minor misnomers:Charity should be swapped with vocation (the world does not pay you for charity); Career should be renamed Work. Satisfaction should be renamed Self-satisfaction because the world does not need what you are doing in this region)


Every single one of us will likely have, to a greater or lesser degree, a different answer to this question, even though we are all single human beings who live on the same little planet with distinctly similar goals, aims and abilities.

We can make big things about our various, largely minor, differences, but the truth is there is not all that much difference between any of us – certainly not when compared to things that are not human – we all share a lot in common.

We are born largely helpless and dependent upon those willing to tend to our need for food and shelter and companionship. We grow and learn. We seek out others as a way of better surviving the challenges of life and to share our experiences with and hopefully learn from those experiences of others (like don’t go up and pull the tail of that nice orange, black-striped, big toothted cat, for example). Some find someone they can like enough to reproduce with – for almost all of history this was, of necessity, someone of an opposite sex to their own, but no longer, it seems.

Such people generally take on the responsibility of looking after their off-spring as well as trying to look after themselves (and perhaps others, such as employees/ parents/ relatives/ countries) until finally they die, leaving any progeny to repeat the cycle ad infinitum, ideally with the Hope that each generation improves upon the product of the previous one.

Some find (or accept) this is their purpose: to be born, live, breed and die, hopefully doing no serious damage to the chances of others to do the same along the way and ideally to find that, for at least 50% of their time, they are what they would call ‘Happy'(or perhaps comfortable or at peace might be a better choice of word?)

If this is the purpose of all life (as it seems to be for every other living organism but the Human one) then i have not yet fulfilled my purpose, nor am i likely to before i pass on from this life.

My Hope is that – if only for me – there is some greater purpose to life that i may find and go some way toward achieving.

Maybe the purpose of life is to Strive (suffer?/overcome sufferring?) after or for something of personal/humanitarian benefit?

Does anyone have any better vision of their/’our’ purpose?

Which would you chose?

So what kind of world would you prefer to live in?

If you had to chose one ‘type’ which would you prefer?

A totally free world where everyone could do anything they want?

A world where individual Ethics/Morality governed everyones thought and action? or

A world governed primarily by universal Laws for the ‘common’ good?

Total freedom equates to anarchy – no rules, no punishment for any action, complete freedom to do what you want to do when you want to do it with no comeback from any other person. Given all human’s capacity for temptation and desire for self-satisfaction at the expense of others this is not a choice i would make.

An individual ethic/morally oriented world would seem at first glance to suit both theists, atheists and undecideds alike – each being free to live by their own moral code (and presumably also free to break it on any occasion also without much penalty, other than perhaps some personal feeling of guilt, since in this proposal morality takes the place of law in matters of crime and punishment. See next para.) Under this consideration however, there would seem to be little to distinguish it from the first choice as every individual is free to live by their own morality and they get to decide for themselves what is right and wrong. Universal agreement is unlikely to occur in such a system and violence and disagreements between individuals/groups/tribes a likely result.

A world governed primarily by universal Law poses somewhat of a problem as it requires agreement by all on exactly what the common good is for the entire planet – something which i’m reasonably sure has not been achieved at any point in human history as we have basically been fighting one another for food/territory since we first came down from trees and learned to walk on two legs. Once laws are set then penalties for those who break or don’t keep to the law are required; these often mean that the common good is not best served, for example consider the cost to a community of imprisoning otherwise useful members of a society and the cost of paying others to guard/look after them in prison, an almost universal form of punishment for law-breakers today. (Although not necessarily a good or preferable one).

Trying to set up different law systems for different communities is setting the systems up to fail as this will inevitably result in conflict as different communities come into contact with each other and their citizens are faced with two or more differing sets of laws to comply with – some of which could be directly contradictory. The only way to avoid this is to just have the one common set that all agree to or to have strictly isolated communities, each with their own laws.

So could we ever live in agreement with everyone else? Or live isolated from those with whose laws we do not fully agree with?

Or are we condemned to live forever in disharmony and dischord; without a common set of fundamental values we all agree are to be kept if we are to maximise our common interests of survival, safety, beneficial development and happiness?





Child Sexual Abuse

( This is primarily directed to Australians but most of you will probably see parallels in your own lands)

First and foremost, I believe firmly that ANYONE who physically or sexually abuses a child should suffer an eternity in hell (and if I’m not mistaken Christ Himself said as much).

Having said that i need to say the following:

If you see or hear much of the media (social and or mainstream/alternative) lately you’d be forgiven for thinking Religion and in particular the Catholic Church is responsible for all (ok – the vast reported majority of) sexual abuse in Australia. News reports have been flowing from the The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse constantly for months, frequently leading news programs or headlines. The stories are always horrific and tragic for the victims and i in no way wish to underplay the importance of both to those concerned.

However we are NOT getting the whole picture and i believe we all need a reminder of what is really happening here.

The commission is looking into some 4400 cases of abuse, most of which are alleged to have been committed by members of religious organisations (split fairly evenly, by the way, between priests, non-ordained members and simple lay people (the public) assisting the church!) This is from some 60 years of occurrences! While i am positive this is by no means the total number it is the number of people who have been willing to speak of it to authorities and who have been taken seriously by them. It averages to 75 cases a year!

This figure is a little misleading as the average time between abuse occurring and it being reported and believed by authorities enough to investigate and be included in these statistics is some 33 years – meaning it is likely many abuses have occurred in the last 30 years that have not been included but should be.

Even so the numbers of people who have been abused by religion are but a drop in the ocean compared to the figures for Australia taken in total.

According to the Australian Institute for Health and Welfare in 2014/15 there were 320 000 notifications of child abuse in that year alone of which 150,000 were investigated and 56,000 found to be substantiated (involving some 42,000 separate children).”Only” some 5600 of these were of a sexual nature while another 7400 concerned physical abuse. ( mental abuse and neglect accounting for the majority).

So in just one year (and the figures are increasing each year now) there were 25% more substantiated acts of child sexual abuse in this country than were reported to the Royal Commission, which covered more than 60 years of institutional abuse!

Let that sink in a little… you are some 80 times more likely to be abused outside an institution than in one! (75 a year inside to 5600 a year outside!).

So i hope all those self-righteous hypocrites who try to make out the Churches are such deviates and hypocrites will now be shouting loud and long about all ‘normal’ Australians who abuse their own kids at far higher rates than any church ever has.

Basically you are in far greater risk of being abused by your own ‘Father’ (mother, brother/uncle/neighbour) than a father in a church, Catholic or otherwise.

And that is just the ones that get reported – how many kids report on their own family members who abuse them? Reporting such a personal violation is never an easy thing to do for various reasons, it’s much easier to report on a comparative stranger though, to dobbing in your own flesh and blood.

Now how many News Agencies have bothered to give this angle a fair and unbiased reporting? Can you any longer trust any media to give you all the facts rather than the ones that sell the most papers or bring the biggest crowds/ratings?

And can i say how disappointed i am in religion and churches for not defending themselves by making it clear that while they are far from blameless when it comes to hypocritical and self-serving actions and abuse of innocents they are in all likelihood less likely to be child abusers than the rest of our society as a whole – at least based upon Australian research and statistical evidence.


A Suggestion


If you didn’t already know March 1 is World Compliment Day!

But why wait for one day a year?

You may do this already, and Bravo! if you do, but if you don’t then how about choosing to make it a point of your day, every single day, to give someone – even a stranger- a sincere and heartfelt compliment?

You don’t have to stop at one person, you could give lots since they are free and only cost a few seconds of thought and of your time.

This way we get into the habit of looking for good things in others and not just seeing bad ones.

We make people feel good about themselves for a time, possibly just when they need it the most.

We might even just help make the world a bit better place to live in.

You don’t even need to do it to their face you can use any of the social media including e-mail. (Or WordPress! 🙂 )

You could even start a chain of compliments – give someone one and ask them to pass it on to someone else!  (preferably a different one than the one they got – one they choose/think of). See if it comes back to you or if it spreads around the globe? It might even become the next ‘thing’, like the Ice Challenge only kinder.



What The World Needs Now….

(An ongoing post – come back for future updates)

Is More…

Love, Consideration, Thought, Congratulations, Respect, Humour, Self-awareness (introspection of personal motivations and beliefs), Research, Responsibility, Restraint (Self-control),

Is Less…
Hatred, Intolerance, Opinions posted on ‘(Anti-)social media’, Abuse, Humour which is predominantly at the expense of others, Drugs, Fake news, Bias, Need to hurry, Violence broadcast as ‘entertainment’, Advertising, Self(ish)-promotion,

Two Selves

Again, Commenters here are sharpening my thinking – i love that!

I think there is something we (including me) NEED to clearly understand if we are to become closer to Him!

It is our DUAL ‘nature’.

We are most definitely creatures OF the World – our bodies and most of our mind owes it’s entire physical, fleshy existence to it – we were made from the ‘dust’, we eat only that which is earthly and we drink water from the air and the ground and the ocean (indirectly). Our five senses (which feed our minds) were made solely to receive information of the world about us – the physical world.

This is so obvious to some humans it is ALL they see and believe in – all they can conceive of as real.

As children we learn to focus on this entirely for our survival. Some never pass that learning.

But this is not our origin! Nor is it our final destination.

We come from dust and we will soon return to it and the world shall continue as before…


That is not our end! – Nor was the World our beginning.

We HAVE a spiritual being as well as the physical one – the evidence is very hard for science to detect (because it does not know where to begin looking, nor is there any ‘payoff’ to do so.)

But I believe it to be So – and I believe Jesus knew this and was the embodiment of BOTH worlds in ONE.

We HAVE a spiritual nature, being, ‘body’ in addition to our physical one. Eastern philosophy and religions may allow for even further bodies also – a mental body of pure thought energies for one, but for now we do not need to consider any more than just Two (in One).

It is often hard, bordering on impossible, to think of the two body’s as being independent – we spend most of our life thinking of just ‘us’ as being all we are – everything all ‘lumped’ into one of ‘me’.

But the Physical and the Spiritual are not the same thing.

They are most definitely interlinked… “On Earth – as it is in Heaven” is not just a cute saying in a prayer (the Lord’s Prayer – Matt Ch 6) it is a statement, reminding all Christians that there is an ‘above’ and a ‘below’, and as from Genesis 1, there is something below and something above ‘heaven’ – go on read the first chapter again – especially the first ten verses.

It’s the first ten verses of our Holy Scripture – God’s Word and have any of us understood all it says?

Waters above and waters below heaven – living waters.

If thou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given thee living water.
John 4:10

and from John 4:24:

God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.

We are to Worship God from spirit. But we are to also worship in truth – meaning we cannot worship him only from spirit but our heart and mind and body must do the same as our spirit – we must be ‘true’ in all ways and not be ‘double minded’ – following God with our spirit but not our earthly body and mind.

It can be VERY difficult for us to easily tell which is which, sometimes.

Our minds are at times able to trick us into thinking we are doing one thing (being in spirit ‘with’ God – doing His Will) when we are more truly doing our own will and not His. Pandering to our ego’s desire for control and not surrendering it up to Him.

It gets VERY tricky indeed to tell the difference – and its something we all need to work out for ourselves – others are not often able to offer much in the way of help – we either ‘get it’ or we don’t – if we don’t God is likely to keep on providing either the same kind of way or a new kind of way to bring what we are doing incorrectly to our attention.

Sometimes we can’t see the wood for the trees – it is so close we can’t focus properly and get ‘stuck’ in one place trying so hard when all that is needed is a small ‘step back’ and a clear head and heart to ‘see’ more clearly what our ‘problem’ actually is.

I believe a pretty good first step is to recognise that there are actually two of ‘us’ – one physical/earthly and one spiritual/heavenly. A second step would be to learn how to let the latter guide and move the former, not the reverse that many of us do presently.