Seven Deadly Sins – Part V. LUST !

OK – it’s been quite a while since Greed so to recap….

i am trying to ‘cover’ each of the Seven ‘Deadly’ Sins – ones which some believe we will go straight to Hell for – no eternal life in Heaven if we do ANY of these – so i hope none of you are counting on getting there any time? – Me? – now? (D.S. number 5) – i’m Doomed for sure 😦

The aim here is to describe how the ‘sins’ MIGHT have been a part of our own lives and what if anything we have done to rid them from us – what things are we willing/capable/able to do to fend them off and avoid them for ‘good’?

Usually there are a few ‘definitions’ to make the sin described more easily able to be understood and recognised then i have a go at starting the ball rolling ( so far of the 5 covered, only gluttony and maybe anger i felt were an ‘issue’ for me but – well, you be my ‘judge’) 😉

Lust:–noun
1. intense sexual desire or appetite.
2. uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire or appetite; lecherousness.
3. a passionate or overmastering desire or craving (usually fol. by for): a lust for power.
4. ardent enthusiasm; zest; relish: an enviable lust for life.

(from Wikipedia)…
Lust (or lechery) ( Latin term is luxuria – same root as luxury!!) is usually thought of as involving obsessive or excessive thoughts or desires of a sexual nature. Unfulfilled lusts sometimes lead to sexual or sociological compulsions and/or transgressions including (but obviously not limited to) sexual addiction, adultery, bestiality, rape, and incest. Dante’s criterion was “excessive love of others,” which therefore rendered love and devotion to God as secondary. In “Purgatorio”, the penitent walks within flames to purge himself of lustful/sexual thoughts and feelings. (through Holy Fire?)

I think the key word here is ‘excessive’ – which is a bit tricky because who is to say exactly when a sexual desire is being held by someone to ‘excess’. Just as not everyone who eats is a glutton, not everyone who has sexual desire is guilty of lust.

God’s First Commandment to His Latest Creation, Man, was “Go forth and multiply!” so clearly, He thought sex was something we should have and there are times when many of us just don’t feel ‘in the mood’ so a few urges are no bad thing in and of themselves.

After all – we all gotta ‘eat’ – right?

So – Excessive sexual desire or desire for things such as power, fame, fortune, good looks (Cosmetic surgery or fashions? – Prada shoes, for example?) could all fit into the sin of Lust.

For me, the line gets drawn between ‘healthy’ and ‘excessive’ desire when it begins affecting adversely your or your partner’s, or kids’, or community’s, life.

Sometimes, it can be quite dificult actually determining that, and we are seldom the best judge of when something is adversely affecting our own lives as we are LOATHE to admit to ourselves that something has become a problem we are no longer in control of. We generally ‘know’ but won’t admit or take steps to change until long after we should have.

Now comes the tricky personal bit…

Like many before me i have had to face coming to terms with lust via a particular form… Pornography.

It has affected my life adversely for far longer than i care to recall, starting when i broke the law to steal men’s magazines from shops as a school kid for ‘cheap thrills’. I did this enough times to warrant it being labelled a problem, although at the time i only saw the problem being one of petty theft. 

It is only much later in life i see what the true ‘crime’ was and am learning to overcome it.

After i turned 18 and was legally able to purchase or subscribe to the magazines, the theft stopped and just a litle guilt semed the biggest problem – i never felt right buying a magazine form a female counter attendant.

After i met my wife to be (and for a time before as sexual needs were being met by girlfriends) i stopped with the magazines and found a healthier ‘outlet’ for those desires which i do not feel were excessive – at least i was able to stay in control and they never caused any harm in my relationships.

A gap of some twenty years or so lasted during which no real issue was being felt (with one ‘unnoticed’ exception that i am coming to) and then two things coincided to ensure a return of an old problem. One  a relationship broke down, and, fatally – the WWW was born! Unlimited free porn if you knew where to ‘look’ – and then, even if you didn’t know where!

The combination of the two proved irresistable to a computer junkie like me 😦

Combined with a job where i could get free internet hi-speed access and printing capabilities to make copies of web images, i reverted to ‘form’. Not a high point of my life.

Worse was making a dumb mistake and leaving printed copies on a work laser printer for my Boss to find. She was NOT ‘amused’. I was not fired but it was fair to assume promotional prospects suddenly took a nose dive and i partly chose/was partly pushed out of a government position some months later.

But my BIGGEST problem i did not realise until later. As a result of oogling thousands upon thousands of air-brushed unimaginably well-photographed, sometimes synthetic goddesses with ‘perfect’ skin and bodies i had ‘conditioned’ my self to seek and respond only to the most visually beautiful women and this somewhat limited my ability to form relationships, especially as i tended to have a somewhat low self-esteem and a tendency to believe that if i was looking for ‘perfection’, then the odds were so were those women, and they could do better than me as a date.

Kind of shallow i know, but it took me many years to realise this and then to begin to do something about it.

Remnants of it linger still.

Pronography has not been a thing i have ‘lusted’ for now for a couple of years and while i still find myself attracted to ‘good-looking’ women i am able to see i do that and can catch myself if i ever begin to think that external beauty is what is important over the beauty within. Physical beauty is no longer my Prime factor in determining if i can have a relationship with someone – in fact, i look with scepticism now at ‘beautiful people’ believing that what is outside is rarely matched by what is in the person themselves.

It has taken a LONG time to get to this point – i feel if i had not given into that temptation as a 13 year old kid my life could have been a much happier and ‘balanced’ one in the long term than it has been.

How have i overcome lust?

Looking back to try and find what caused it… recognising my error i had carried unnoticed for over 30 years. (that external beauty is the only thing or that is the most desirable) and recognising more what Love is and how it differs to lust.

Now if i can JUST do the same for Cars as i have for women i might be in with a chance? 🙂

So… any of you had run-in’s with a lust or two and have you made ‘progress’ yet?

 

Care to share a comment with us?

Phew: i’m glad THAT is over!

Ok – A Quickie…

Tonight (day) might be The Night (The Day) one of MY countrymen does what no other Aussie has ever managed to do despite them trying for close to a century now.

Something American Lance Armstrong did on his own a record breaking Seven Times (albeit under a cloud of mostly unproven drug taking claims). That he did so with the help of seven or eight team-mates each time in NO way under-values the incredible feat he achieved – especially considering it was done after recovering from testicular cancer! (OW!)

Tonight (Day) an Aussie by the name of Cadel Evans might just go one better than his second place finish last year and WIN Major Modern Sports most grueling endurance feat…

The Tour de France.

The world of cycling’s greatest and most prestigous challenge of abilities across a wide range of cycling endeavours – sprints, mountain climbs and sheer stamina and determination. Speeds of over 60 MPH are achieved, crashes are common and even death occurs. 21 days of bravery and skill.

In terms of spectators present it is the single greatest annual sporting event.

It ends Sunday so, if you get the chance, see what all the fuss is about – even if it is only the highlights on the news.

GO Cadel !!!

Bear with me a while everyone…

am working on a new post – ‘Deadly’ Sin Number Five – Lust!

NOT. EASY!!! 😳

Maybe this weekend?

Maybe not? 😉

Be thankful Friday…

Errr… “YEAH’ – i KNOW it’s Tuesday!

But KIM asked me to join her contest and i said i would but i have been sucking at maintaining my ‘regular’ schedule lately and i have gotten a little behind (first time in YEARS – i don’t DO ‘diets’ lol) 🙂

So a week and a bit late and without the button link… back to Kim’s (please – drop by and say i said “Hi” from me anyway) 🙂 post…

What i have to be thankful for (this week and most days of LIFE in Australia):

A Mother, who, although getting on a little in years and has fewer operating parts than when she gave me Birth is still as loving and giving and only a little bit ‘crankier’ than ever – love you Mum. 🙂

A body that although getting on a little bit in years has provided me with almost half a century of ‘faithful’ service, in the main, in ‘faultless’ condition despite some less than perfect self-maintenance at times. ( i could have done without the gall stone and the kidney stones but – not that i am complaining here – i have got off lightly so far – compared to billlions. 🙂 )

Two Eyes that frequently open wide with the wonder of it all – Life on earth (and beyond);that have seen much and have allowed me to see things i never could have drreamed possible – and all without glasses! And that have at times wept, many times from pain, but equally many from overwhelming love and Joy.

Two ears that have heard so much that has brought great pleasure, wisdom, some sadness and much Love – music is truly a wondrous thing as can be the human voice and the ideas it is capable of expressing – particularly when the words spoken come from the heart.

Two arms and hands that have performed almost faultlessly (typo’s excepted) – even if mostly my will and not (yet) His. This may change over the remaining years of life. The wonder of Touch is something often overlooked and yet is an invaluable part of my learning – and loving… and Giving.

Two legs and feet that have been as efficient as my hands and arms and yet have probably had to do ‘more’ work for less ‘reward’. Cycling has been a major part of my life since moving to Australia for most of my 40 years here., improving and maintainig health ( for a long time) as well as allowing me to see much i would otherwise have missed in my city – and my country and life in general. I am truly thankful to the ‘flesh and bone’ of which i have been given such a great ‘gift’.

A Brain that ‘puts it all together’ down here for me to have some chance of figuring it all out and reaching ‘up there’ – one day – with luck and effort and making the ‘right’ Choice.

A heart that, if truly worthy, may just be my Saving Grace; one that has managed to be so blessed – particularly NOW – at this time in my life, possibly moreso than at any other time; one that is still able to be surprised and amazed and has not yet become so hardened that it forgot where it came from nor how it got here or is ungrateful for ANY/ALL of ‘it’.

My Friends, past and present, each of whom have invariably given me more than i felt i managed to return to them – maybe i should try harder? To any reading this… you are loved more than you even know. And i am VERY thankful to have made your friendship – if only for a ‘moment’ in time.

My Aunt, who i feel was a large part responsible for making me the person i am today – with a very inquisitive and ‘searching’ mind – i owe her a deep gratitude.

For any of a thousand things/events/people that transpired in some way in my life this week alone that made an ‘ordinary’ day into an extraordinary second, minute or hour.

And for ALL of the Blessings He Bestows me – whether i ‘recognise’ and praise them at the time – or not. 🙂

Amen.

Just to let you all know….

I have managed to ‘fix’ my computer ( all it needed was threateing with a large Axe!) 😉 and i NOW have my old chat room up and running..

As with most things there are some good balanced with some not so good…

Anyone is free to pop by and chat to whomsoever is in the room anytime at all just by clicking on the ‘old’ chat for now – i am still fine tuning the New ‘Test’ Chat ( will have ‘improvements!)

The not so good??

I am learning that ‘chat’ has a way of running away with me time-wise and so i am going to limit myself to one day a week when i chat there – most likely being a Monday evening, US time ( when i may be on for a few hours for folk from diff time-zones to drop by and say Howdy!) 🙂

Randomness Quiz

So Forgive me if this is not a new or original idea/concept…

But a lot of people seem somewhat ‘keen’ on a new post and this is something i can ‘fit in’ as a quick ‘fill-in’.

(before i tackle some more serious stuff).

 

The idea is i put up a bunch of Random statements about me some of which are true and have really occured and some of which have not and are not ‘real’.

You get to choose which of ten things you think are things that did happen in my life, so far ( and which, if any i hope will one day?)

 

Ready? Here goes anyway – have ‘fun’ y’all.

 

1. I was born in Staffodrshire, England in the ‘fifties’.

2. I was born the illegitimate heir to the Wedgewood (pottery) fortune and estates but my parents did not want me to grow up corrupted and so moved to Australia to ensure i never laid claim to them.

3. Before emigrating i sang in the London Schoolboys Choir at St Pauls Catherdal on more than one occasion.

4. In England ( no Sun) i had freckles. In Australia ( nothing BUT Sun) i lost them.

5. In the 80’s i worked for 7 months as a bandicoot sexer, separating male bandicoot eggs from the female ones.

6. i wear a US sized 13 shoe ( Aus sized 12).

7. In a nationwide TV survey designed to test IQ based upon age and abilities i scored in the top 5% of the country and scored higher than any of the ‘famous’ Australians who took part in the show.

8. I was voted ‘cuter than a teddy bear’ at the Annual State Pineapple Fair in 2004.

9. I am allergic to pollen. ( not a good thing for a gardener).

10. Apart from the house of my parents i grew up in, the longest i have ever lived in one house (including my own i was buying) is 19 months and have had over 30 different addresses in 23 years.

 

and for a Bonus ‘point’…

I have lived some part of my life on 3 different continents – so far. Name them.