Love Is…?


A good question!

It’s something each one of us holds dear to our heart but how clear is it in our mind?

Each of us has our own understanding of the term but for this post i would like us to go just a little bit ‘beyond’ our personal feeling of what ‘love’ is -to what True Love is – God’s Love, not the thing man tries to make of it. The Thing that exists independently of our own self and can enter into us but is much, much more than we can contain entirely.

That Kind of LOVE.

The Love which Unites Everything.

The idea is you think about it a little – you try to get the ‘essence’ and then you say it in either one word, OR a sentence, beginning: ‘Love is…’

Here are a few of mine to get you ‘thinking’.

Love is Life.

Love is Patient.

Love is Courageous.

Love is Total Commitment.

Love is always open to reason.

Love is Compassionate (being together in passion)

Love is the complete opposite of Fear.

So, don’t be shy, give me your thoughts – and you don’t have to limit them to just one.

I’m compling the Definitive Little Book of Love and you may be able to help finish it. 🙂


  1. Sitting on a park bench for hours without saying a word; yet at the end, feeling as if you’ve had the longest conversation ever.


  2. Hello Friendster! How are you doing? This is a very good post! I love it! 🙂

    You know what? I like what you said about the kind of love you are thinking about — “the Thing that exists independently of our own self and can enter into us but is much, much more than we can contain entirely.”

    That, in itself, is already a great definition of what love is. 🙂

    I’ll come back and try to say something about that kind of love you are looking for (not the kind I posted in my blog to which you commented long time ago). Let me just get in touched with my inner self. 🙂

    Be right back!



  3. Love is unconditional…:)
    Love is Complicated
    Love is Challenging
    Love is Dangerous
    Love is Adventurous
    Love is Unpredicatable


  4. i’ve been mulling a lot lately over the fact that “love always trusts”. it chooses to see and believe the best in people. phew… i’ve got a lot to learn!


  5. I have to say, there are different kinds of love….love for others, which is the kind I think you choose. Love for family, which can go either way. Love for your kids, which I don’t think you choose…. there is NO WAY I could not love my kids. There just isn’t. I don’t think any mom could NOT love their kids. You’d have to try really hard not to, and even then I’m not so sure. That’s why I said it’s sometimes a choice, b/c really, there is no choice in the matter of loving my kids. That would be like saying I choose to breath…. I don’t choose to breath, it just happens. To choose NOT to breath would kill me. So would choosing NOT to love my kids. It just wouldn’t happen.

    I strongly believe that the love for our kids is the strongest kind of love we can ever know. Then it makes me think about how God loves us even MORE than we love our babies, and it’s just so overwhelming, b/c I can’t imagine loving them more than I do. It’s just amazing. 😀

    LOVE! You went and make me think teary things! 😉


  6. I remember after my first baby I was reading an article about being a new mother, the writer said she had tried to explain it to a friend who had just given birth. The words were too hard to find to explain the change that overtakes a woman, it’s like having a wound that never heals. You see a rawness to life you never understood before, because now you understand real danger, real hurt that is in the world.

    I’ve said it before on this blog and I’ll say it again…Love hurts.


  7. “Love is a battlefield…” **In her best Pat Benetar** 😆 Couldn’t resist!

    Love is an emotion so powerful that it can make your heart soar or crash, even with people you never met. In addition to the Corinthians verse, it also has different depths. Love to me happens between two people, and forms a bond from which grows trust and intimacy. Love enhances my relationships, and comforts my very soul. It needs to be experienced, not just felt, and can not be measured. Love can be created if focused on the goodness of another. I also believe that if this is done easily, you can easily love….everyone has a positive aspect, no matter how bad the behaviors, which is where love keeps our focus. God said to “love all”. My romantic love for my husband is deep, intense and unending, whithin that we share very intimately, personally and sexually….alot… 😉 (Sorry) My platonic loves also have great affection and I try to tend to as many as I can. Love is sometimes questioned..but love allows us to understand each other and helps us to remember no one is perfect. Perfect Love? Ya, His name is Jesus…. ♥ u!


  8. Now THAT’s What I’m talking about!

    I love you people!

    Bran – i’m sorry for your tears but that just might be the nicest thing i’ve ever heard you say to me! 🙂

    Love is a Battlefield! I’d forgotten about Pat. I think she had it a liitle out of focus though – LOVE is not the battlefield – Love IS – we are where the battle begins. The battlefield is our minds and the ego’s they contain – never our Heart or LOVE that infiltrates it, permeates it.

    I’m giving Pat 2 out of 10 for that one (but i do like the song!)

    I certainly agree that there are different kinds of, or perspectives of, Love – but there is ONE ‘common’ root of those – True Love – independent of how it makes us feel. (personal love)

    WE humans find different ways of receiving and giving it through various mechansims within each one of us – i think we are required to Learn this about ourselves and become more ‘perfect’ in the Love we express back to all others.

    As an exercise – try making up a few ‘Love is NOT….’ essences. Hint – look at how Love makes you do things that don’t produce ‘good’ results for you, or for others. Love is NOT that – that is You! (in that circumstance).

    Love is NOT Selfish.

    Also, i see the Love i am talking about with a capital ‘L’ as compared to the more personal human type we ‘feel’ as being with a little ‘l’.

    I’m asking for Big L Love definitions 🙂

    Put your Heart into it 🙂


  9. I have learned that love is an action not a feeling. And it’s a choice. Not an easy one many times but definitely a choice. God choses to love us in spite of our sin, in spite of our disobedience, in spite of just being us. We can choose to love people too. Again, not easy, but still a choice we all have both the privilege and responsibility to make.

    Alece, I am with you about still learning. I think about love being long-suffering and I think how I have not come to grasp the true meaning of “long” in that term. Praise God for His patience as He moulds me to have a better understanding.

    At my last job, my daily prayer was to help me love others. God gave me a starking revelation during that time. He does not help us love others who are easy to love or who love us in the same way. He helps us to love those that we find difficult to love, or show love to. I know that may have been obvious to some of you but for me that was such an eye-opener. Those daily frustrations or “pet peeves” with our loved ones is not what He’s talking about, it’s those people who use us spitefully. It’s those people who persecute us. PHEW. A tall order but possible through Him.

    Love is NOT prideful.


  10. Love is not degrading

    Love is not insecure

    Love is not out of reach

    Love is not conditional (or at least it shouldn’t be) but I think we all love on condition…


  11. This is ALL good work – keep ’em coming!

    Evening Bran, Evenin’ Tam. 🙂

    Thank you GC – we CAN choose Love – i was thinking more along the lines of what IS it that we choose – more than the individual making the choice. 🙂

    Less about US – more about IT – so we can see how we many times do not live UP to IT – so we can see how we get things wrong and do what is required of us to overcome that which is corrupting His Word within us so often. 🙂


  12. I agree Tam – i think all of us tend towards underlying ‘conditions’ when we love.

    Matthew 5 has, after the ‘blessed are the…”, a few instructions for us on how we should Love AGAINST those conditions we most often place upon our love that we give to others.

    Every single one of them is HARD – it seems to go against ‘our’ grain.

    Love and Christ place very big demands of our capacity to be charitable and generous to all those we meet Equally, including those who do not show Love towards us in the first insatance.

    WE are not to meet ‘like with like’ but to meet ALL with Love.

    Easy to say – very hard sometimes to practice.

    That does not mean we are not to try however. 🙂

    True Love is indeed un-conditional. It is Light that seeks not more light, but seeks first the darkness so as to bring Light unto it.

    When we place ‘conditions’, even sub-consciously, we put ourself before Him – in the way of True Love.


  13. Love is always available but not always taken or recieved. Love can be hard when you view it through the eyes of flesh and not Spirit.

    Michelle: Love is not tempermental??? Dang 🙄

    Love you love!!!


  14. Love is a feeling. You feel it towards someone or you don’t. My guess is that love is unconditional. We may dislike, even feel hatred toward a person, and still feel the emotion of love when you see them. I doubt if we can control who we feel love for.

    Just a few of the things that I associate with the word love:

    Love – sweaty palms, heart racing, can’t speak.

    Love -a scent that brings back a moment of passion.

    Love – a baby’s smile


  15. Moning Deb, Ed.

    Deb, i think you’re on a roll! You really are picking up that when we live only in the flesh we don’t receive the full Glory of Love – we get a still powerful, but not in the way it could be to our benefit, kind of ‘force’ which leads to certain actions in us. Ones which focus primarily upon the selfish aspects of our being.

    Ed, 70’s Supergroup Boston wrote – It’s More Than A Feeling – coming from the East Coast you might recall it? 🙂

    Love is… a Verb. Love is… a Command (from a Higher Authority).

    Just a few thoughts I hope to put ‘out there’. 🙂


  16. Love is not fearful.
    Love is terrifying.

    Love is not confusing.
    Love is ridiculously complex.

    Love cannot be hidden.
    Love is a mystery.

    How’s that for a breakfast of dichotomy!


  17. Welllll, i usually prefer cereal – but just this once 🙂

    I still think though that we need less of the ‘us’ and more of the Love, to define Love.

    I don’t think Love is Terrifying – i think we can be terrified, sometimes, because of it’s power and/or ‘oppositeness’ to what we think it ‘should’ be, want it to be/do for us.

    I do like you dropping by though 🙂


  18. Hi! I am back. Here’s the result of my reflection on love. Fresh from the oven:

    Love is that which continuous to shine even when everything has turned gray; the only thing on earth that is capable of upholding the right, and righting the wrong. It is the home that closes its door to envy, deception and betrayal; the arm that embraces truth, and the heart that pumps out compassion. It is the mist that kisses away human troubles and pains, the rainbow that inspires redemption. Calm like the sunset, it is lovelier than Venus, and more powerful than Zeus. It is like the clouds we see across the summer sky — light, because it carries no grudge.

    //Sherma E. Benosa
    21 May 2008; 1:17am


  19. Hi Sherma 🙂

    You didn’t write some of the books of the Bible did you??

    I thought i recognised the poetic imagery style in some Psalms and other books of the Old Testament 😉

    Thank you for coming back with your thoughts, my friend. 🙂


  20. Hi Cathi! 🙂 Indeed, love makes the world go round!

    Hello Friendster! Hi Michelle. Thank you to both of you. You made me blush! 🙂 But then, I hope you know that it’s really YOUR doing? You inspired me to write that in the first place. The truth is that you all have been inspiring me for quite some time now, since I came to this blog and I started reading what everyone is saying. I’m amazed how you all could easily elevate the level of discussion, from temporal to spiritual. I see the deepening of friendship and love each time one posts, and I love that. Can’t help thinking, “this is great.” In fact, I’m now thinking of dyeing my hair red! 😉 It might not go well with my oriental eyes though. 😦

    Friendster! Has it ever occurred to you that maybe, just maybe, I “plagiarized” the bible? Hehehehehe 🙂


  21. Hi Love bug…I really need to stop calling you that…I looked them up and they are NOT attractive…

    I really don’t have anything to add ….just that I love you and thinkin of ya…Gods on the throne and I’m not, so BE HAPPY!!! 🙂


  22. Hey Debs, every time i think of Love Bug i think of Herbie – the Volkswagen! 🙂

    Happy is good! and that’s a great reason to be.

    I think we do need some ‘sad’ in our lives or human nature will diminish the quality of happiness if we have nothing to compare it to.

    Sherma! 🙂 I would be happy to think Scripture influences your style sometimes – but i don’t imagine you’d ever plagiarise them 🙂

    I also love the coming together of the regular blog contributors i now feel more a ‘part’ of… and you are most welcome to join in – i will think of you always as a ‘Spiritual’ Redhead 🙂

    It probably is best if our Spirit body does not exactly relate entirely to our fleshy one 🙂

    To everyone generally – One thing about this post saddens me somewhat…

    Ed is the ONLY male to comment, besides myself. (i am unsure but suspect the three first-time guest commenters were most likely female too).

    What’s with men and Love? Didn’t Jesus express His a lot? – when did that stop and why?


  23. Welcome Selena – always nice to see a first time commenter 🙂

    If i ask the world what is ‘right’ then i KNOW i’m going to be disappointed – i’d rather trust my own intuition – it rarely, if ever lets me down.

    Speaking as one who was divorced over 20 years ago i can quite informedly say that Romantic love – despite the apparent contradiction many will claim – is a mainly selfish thing and one of almost total self-delusion. (We see what we want to see – not what actually is)

    If we learn to be honest with ourselves and not remain selfish then we have a chance to know True and everlasting Love.


  24. we are all selfish 99.9% of the time – we are the product of it.

    Many don’t like what we have produced and turn outwards – away from ‘us’ – never ‘facing the Truth’.

    The real answers all lie ‘within’, inside of the ‘Self’. Our intuition (connection to our Spirit) can provide us with the way ‘out’ – if we earnestly seek it.

    Some only do that when we get ‘desperate’ enough – when we fall so far we feel like ‘we’ (our selfish self) can never get up again.

    Some have built up such very great barriers – walls- (perhaps with the ‘help’ of the ‘outside world’) that they just can’t get in touch with their own intuition. Or don’t ever understand the need to.


  25. Tam – i understand!

    But that is NOT love!

    It’s the thing many humans end up ‘settling’ for in the false belief it is what ‘Love’ is because it is all they have ever seen or been shown themselves.:-(

    Human ‘love’ is a very minutely reduced component of True Love. It is also somewhat ‘corrupted’ by reason of our own flesh.

    If this is only what we have ever ‘known’ or been shown it becomes ‘normal’ for us.

    We NEED to be shown there is a greater – a better Love.

    We ALL Need to understand that.

    ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥


  26. Love is not a feeling it is a choice. I am sure Christ did not FEEL like suffering and dying for us, but He chose to. Thanks be to God! Love never fails.


  27. Christ did not ‘choose’ to suffer and die – He did not kill himself.

    He knew what may be the likely consequences of His actions and chose not to run and hide from them.

    He Chose to eliminate entirely his selfishness and do ONLY the Will of the One who sent Him – His Father’s Will.

    True Love was most assuredly in His Heart at the time – not thoughts of self-preservation.

    We can be thankful He had more than just human love in Him.

    (Human) Feelings can change.

    Fear is a feeling.


  28. Selena.

    He did NOT Die!

    He Lives Still both in Spirit AND in Body!

    He was seen to be crucified and yet He lived after Death both in Heaven AND on Earth.

    He chose to Trust in and DO His Father’s Will and ONLY that.

    That was His Choice – not to die, but to find everlasting Life.

    It is what He would choose for us all – but we ‘know’ better – don’t we?


  29. I was simply making a point that love is a choice, a sacrfice, as Christ sacrificed His life for us. He didn’t live His life based on feelings. Maybe someone else will get my point.


  30. Jesus was born on earth in human form – as one of us.

    He Overcame that limitation.

    His Spirit (not the spirit of the man, rather The Spirit that temporarily resulted in the human form) was always with God.

    While here Jesus (unlike the majority of people who have lived on this planet) was able to eliminate His human will to the extent that He only ever did the Will of His Father and no ‘selfishness’ was within Him.

    Clearly Jesus described Himself as separate to His Father while He was down Here – He was The Son of Man – and of His Father.


  31. I do not agree that (True) Love is a choice, but our reason for disagreement here is quite simply one of persepctive and experiences, not that either of us are being ‘wrong’ – can you follow that Selena?

    The reason i say it is not a Choice is that i am looking at Love as being a REAL THING – not dependent upon whether we ‘choose it’ or not – it is simply THERE! – ALways – (no choice)

    However, as humans we can choose to see it that way – or another way – we are ‘free’ to make such a choice and so effectively deny Love to ourself.

    We are free to replace it with another kind of thing and call that ‘love’, believing it to be so.
    We are free to see it only as a feeling if we so ‘choose’.

    But ALL the Latter is being totally selfish -making things what WE want to see them as – not as the way things Really are – for ALL.

    Such people are creatng their own ‘reality’ that exists within, and yet ‘independently’ of, True Reality that some on Earth can actually share in.


  32. love is putting others’ needs above your own.

    lovebugs = those are some ANNOYING little creatures. from the south, i know all about them. they are gross. they fly around all locked up together. ugh…


  33. I was HOPING you’d add a comment! 🙂

    Now i just know ‘unselfishness’ is in there somewhere’s – which i think is a good thing…

    … but i’m struggling with it (the definition) for some reason?

    And i have to acceed to your superior awareness of love-bugs from the South.. but flying around together sounds kinda fun to me 🙂


  34. Another Male ‘voice’! 🙂

    I knew you wouldn’t let me down!

    Love is Sacrifice – nice!

    Love is giving! an essential part of learning to give is learning to receive – it’s all about His and Nature’s Balance.

    When we receive – we grow. (ask Alece! Her work could not be achieved without receiving first!))

    As we grow we can give more ourselves. (unless we become greedy and selfish oriented).


  35. I’ve managed to catch up on all the previous comments here, and would agree with most.

    The thoughts I’ve had since reading the post though haven’t quite been expressed yet. Brainteaser did come close though near the beginning of her early AM comment 5/21.

    So, I’ll add my perspective in both the positive and negative:

    Love is…
    risking complete honesty, first with self and God (though He already knows =), then with others, no matter how it might be receieved (that’s the ‘risky’ part).

    and in the negative category:
    Love is not…
    ignoring evil toward or from anyone(but expecially pertaining to those we care for–self included – Mk. 12:31).

    I think this kind of love describes divine Love in that Jesus risked the rejection of men to become ‘The Truth’ to them (Jn. 14:6). Of course He’s exempted from needing to ‘be honest with Himself’ about commiting evil toward others since He never did, like we do ={.

    And if God had just ignored evil He wouldn’t have needed to “love the world so much that He sent His only Son” to provide us the opportunity to be saved from it (Jn. 3:16).

    ‘Sort of complicated to see all the applications within the definitions, but the basic concept is 1 Cor. 13:6:
    “It (Gr.agape= divine love) is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.” NLT

    In ‘it’
    (‘tho not an ‘easy’ place to be for sure =),


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